2863 N Frederick Ave Unit 1

When I was five I wanted a Mr. Potato Head more than anything but my parents couldn't afford one. For Christmas I got a taro root with chopsticks for appendages. Yep, I didn't even get a real potato, I got some weird knockoff root vegetable. Imagine my excitement last week when my son got a Mr. Potato Head. Bewilderingly, within minutes I felt as hollow as that vacuous brown spud in my son's drooly hands. I longed for the joy I once felt stabbing a chopstick into Mr. Taro Root. Two lessons: 1. Always disappoint your children in the most abstruse fashion possible. 2. You can never revisit the past so do things properly cause you only get one chance. Sorry, I know you're just apartment hunting. As my manager at my last job, Arby's, said when she fired me, the drive through window is not for therapy sessions. I'm simply saying, you have an important decision. Do you want to save $30 a month and live in a dilapidated, creepy slumlord house on Cramer (bleh!) or do you want an amazing five bedroom / 1 bath steps from UWM campus offering you the best days of your sweet potato life? The large living room and formal dining room feature ornate trim work, tall ceilings and copious windows. And what sweet pad is complete without a parking lot and free-to-use washer and dryer? Plus, for a limited time, if you share a sad/amusing childhood story I'll give you a Mr. Taro Root after our tour (chopsticks sold separately).